Narkina-5 Imperial Prison
Quick question: how many Golden Oreos can you eat in one sitting? Follow up question: what if some of them in the package are randomly soggy? Is that an issue? Final question: when do candy canes expire? Is February too late to be eating them? These were some of the many culinary inquiries our Valentine's Duelers faced, as our annual February Duel encouraged the participants to bring a sweet treat to share! Kudos to those who remembered - and shame on the league organizer for forgetting!!!
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| Scared Straight: The Narkina-5 Prison Documentary |
The Valentine's Duelers gathered in the Narkina-5 Imperial Prison and, I know you're wondering...how soon did Duelers go off program? The answer: almost immediately! And it stayed off program for most of the night...except for two crucial rounds late in the game when the last four Duelers standing were too delirious NOT to raise their hands over their heads! But I'm getting waaaaay ahead of myself...
Nobody can remember the last time this happened, but the six light side and six dark side Duelers were all sitting six-in-a-row at the table, meaning the respective sides could coordinate extremely well together. The dark side quickly eliminated Caden's Cara Dune, but the light side hatched a bold plan when The Mandalorian played Grappling Line and pulled Rob's Darth Maul into a kill box! But Rob somehow used his Martial Defense to completely block Mando's Disintegration! James/Leia and Elliot/Ahsoka whittled down Maul to near death, but in the first flip of the game (and maybe, maybe aided by Rob running his mouth...), Alex G./Bo-Katan didn't lay the final two hits...and instead joined the dark side!
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| Prison sucks! |
The light side was equal parts nauseated, disgusted, and disgruntled with Alex, while Rob laughed evilly. This allowed the dark side to concentrate their fire on The Mandalorian! Darth Maul got the kill shot with one of his many Sith Speeds, and poor Caden went from hero to the sidelines in last!!! Rob managed a couple of more hits on Ahsoka too, but with zero cards left in his hand, his blaze of glory left him in eleventh. What a way to go, though!
Elliot was still gob smacked by Alex's betrayal, and couldn't believe the position he found himself in. The light side was imploding and he was next to go. Cate's blood lust was satisfied when her Jango Fett used a three point attack to retire Ahsoka in tenth. It was a sound tactic, Elliot, don't beat yourself up!
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| Austin, which Dueler got blind-sided? |
The light side tried to rally. Justin/Mace hopped off the safety of his table to rush Alex's table. He landed a Whirlwind, but didn't use Wisdom to retreat. The dark side launched a silo at poor Mace, with Alex using an Ariel Assault for the knockout punch. Way to go down swinging, Justin!
The only two Duelers left in the light side alliance at that point were James/Princess Leia (Green Leia) and Riley/Luke Skywalker (White Leia). They were sure they were next, especially once Josiah/The Stranger murdered Wicket. But everyone knows Cate can only contain her urge to obliterate others for so long, and when she couldn't get an angle on the light side she Missile Launched/Rocket Retreated Mark's Moff Gideon!!! Alliance disfunction at it's finest! Mark was bewildered, especially when the rest of his alliance followed suit. To add insult to compounding injuries, Moff Gideon was eliminated by being electrocuted by the floor! The next Brooks College staff meeting is going to be AWKWARD.
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| Look at that face - full of Missile Launch glee! |
The crazy twists and turns kept coming. James and Riley got quiet as mice tiptoeing through a room full of sleeping cats when Josiah threw out Ian/Snoke as the next target. The debate came fast and furious, as Ian moved the negative attention to Alex/Bo-Katan and his hesitancy to shoot the light side remnants. Nobody had any idea what to expect from Cate, and Josiah decided her killing spree necessitated the end of her night. In a risky move, his Mae used A New Acolyte to off Jango. That was probably just as well - Cate had a 3AM alarm set for her rugby trip! 😦
This may not be fully appreciated by those who weren't at the Duel, but it was nothing short of a miracle James/Leia and Riley/Luke went from a seemingly 8th and 7th place finish to the top three. They worked extremely well together, but the reality was James' Princess Leia had up to 16 points of automatic damage in her deck, and Riley and Ian were roughed up on their damage indicator cards, so they chose to partner against James. The problem was 8 of those points of auto damage come from Leia's I Know defense cards, so neither wanted to go forward with a frontal assault.
The animosity towards Alex couldn't be ignored at that point. He had no friends left on the board. And in a bit of a control-his-own fate move, he chose to stay off the tables and take his kill shot from the electric floor! The Narkina-5 Prison fried two Duelers on the night!!!
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| The wolves circle Austin... |
Austin/Cad Bane was a loyal dark side alliance member throughout the night, and it was cool he made it to the final five because he took some damage out of the gate. But Ian/Snoke didn't look too keen to have extra shooters on the board, so he named Austin as his target of interest. Austin tried to shake his hand several times to indicate no hard feelings (this is a classic "you had to be there" moment...). Nobody would rescue Cad Bane, but Austin finished a career-best fifth place. Nicely done!
Rather than work together as the last two dominant dark side members, Josiah and Ian declared war on each other! James, who had recently played The Stranger last semester, knew full well Josiah's character was a handful. He and Riley joined Ian...but it took a LONG time for them to finally oust Josiah. I'm talking poorly played Tied To A Strings, I Will Not Fight You's...the works! But Josiah couldn't hold out forever, and James landed the final blow. There's a reason The Stranger is the top ranked character in the league right now - well done Josiah!
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| How did these two make it to the final three??? |
This may not be fully appreciated by those who weren't at the Duel, but it was nothing short of a miracle James/Leia and Riley/Luke went from a seemingly 8th and 7th place finish to the top three. They worked extremely well together, but the reality was James' Princess Leia had up to 16 points of automatic damage in her deck, and Riley and Ian were roughed up on their damage indicator cards, so they chose to partner against James. The problem was 8 of those points of auto damage come from Leia's I Know defense cards, so neither wanted to go forward with a frontal assault.
Ian managed to use some Force Lightnings and Riley's minor Leia kept shooting major Leia (yes, it was trippy), but James smartly killed the minors, forcing the issue by making Ian and Riley stand adjacent to Leia. Ian felt Riley wasn't doing enough, so he ended up turning on Riley, heavily damaging Luke. It was a controversial move as Riley professed she was still with him. But the attack allowed James to finish Riley/Luke in third. Riley had the best hat at the table, though.
The final two was James/Leia and Ian/Snoke! Both were badly damaged and searching for their automatic damage cards (Covert Operation for Leia, Force Lightning for Snoke). Ian had some uncharacteristic mistakes throughout the night, but the worst one was when he lost count of Leia's I Know defense cards. She has two of those - the ones that do four points of damage to whoever attacks - but Ian thought one was already in James' discard pile. As it turns out, he pulled the second one from his draw pile. Ian healed enough to take four points from one of them, but his jaw dropped when he attacked a second time only to get four MORE points of auto damage and lose the game! That's right - James won his first career Duel. Way to go!!!! That's another Dueling trophy for the Teal trophy case. This also marks Princess Leia's second career win.
Final order of finish:
12. Caden/The Mandalorian
11. Rob/Darth Maul
10. Elliot/Ahsoka
9. Justin/Mace Windu
8. Mark/Moff Gideon
7. Cate/Jango Fett
6. Alex G./Bo-Katan
5. Austin/Cad Bane
4. Josiah/The Stranger
3. Riley E./Luke Skywalker
2. Ian/Snoke
1. James/Princess Leia
It's always fun when a Duel produces a first-time winner! James becomes the 41st Dueler in league history to win a Duel!
Due to the basketball schedule and Spring Break, the March Duel - THE IMPERIAL MARCH - will be played the weekend of March 22nd/23rd. We'll have to wait for the tournament bracket to figure out which night Baylor plays (stay above the bubble, Bears!!!). So that means we'll go silent for a few weeks.
Until then...PEW PEW!
